“If I could work my will, every idiot who goes about with ‘Merry Christmas’ on his lips, should be boiled with his own pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart!” ~ Jim Carrey, A Christmas Carol (2009)
Scrooge: "Let us deal with the eviction notices for tomorrow, Mr Cratchit."
Kermit: "Uh, tomorrow’s Christmas, sir."
Scrooge: "Very well. You may gift wrap them."
Michael Caine, A Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)
“The heavenly aroma still hung in the house. But it was gone, all gone! No turkey! No turkey sandwiches! No turkey salad! No turkey gravy! Turkey Hash! Turkey a la King! Or gallons of turkey soup! Gone, ALL GONE!” - A Christmas Story
“We elves try to stick to the four main food groups: candy, candy canes, candy corns and syrup.” - Will Ferrell, Elf
"Every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings.” - Little Zuzu, It's A Wonderful Life
“You’re skipping Christmas! Isn’t that against the law?” - Christmas with the Kranks
“I passed through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gum drops, and then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel.” - Will Ferrell, Elf
"Merry Christmas, you filthy animal." - Home Alone
Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see. - Polar Express
The heavenly aroma still hung in the house. But it was gone, all gone! No turkey! No turkey sandwiches! No turkey salad! No turkey gravy! Turkey Hash! Turkey a la King! Or gallons of turkey soup! Gone, ALL GONE! - A Christmas Story
And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse. - Chevy Chase, Christmas Vacation
"Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap." - A Christmas Story
“When the thermometer gets all reddish, the temperature goes up. And when the temperature goes up, I start to melt! And when I start to melt, I get all wishy-washy.” - Frosty the Snowman
It's Christmas Eve! It's the one night of the year when we all act a little nicer, we smile a little easier, we cheer a little more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year, we are the people that we always hoped we would be! - Bill Murray, Scrooged